Create Shared Meaning – YMMP011

What’s it like to be in a thriving marriage?

Find out today as we discuss the final level of the Sound Relationship House, “Create Shared Meaning.”

Your Marriage Matters has only been in existence for 11 weeks and we’ve shared a plethora of secrets, techniques and tips to get you to the highest level of a fully functioning marriage.

Isn’t it exciting?!

There’s much more to come.

But, for today, sit back, relax and contemplate the important questions as to why you are married, what is the purpose of your marriage, and where are you headed?

Strongly consider creating a mission statement for your marriage. Remember Stephen Covey?  He’s got a lot of tools for you if this is something you’d like to do.

Don’t forget to subscribe to “Marriage Coach Lynn” Youtube channel. Each Motivational Monday episode is a companion to the podcast episode. If I zipped through the suggestion in a podcast episode, you will find a brief explanation on a video on the youtube channel.

Make Your Marriage Great!

Self-Soothing – YMMP009

GO TO TIME OUT!

   We send our children to “time out” when they’re misbehaving. It’s a chance for them to think about what they did wrong.

We need to take a voluntary time out when our arguments get heated. We need to disengage, walk away and regroup in the middle of a spat. Come back when we’ve calmed down.

When we get “flooded,” the best thing we can do is to “self-soothe” for 20 or more minutes.

Listen to today’s episode to make sure you don’t fall into the trap of a lose-lose argument.

“Practice Self-Soothing” is on the Manage Conflict rung of the Sound Relationship House and is the topic for today.

Turn Towards Each Other – YMMP004

How can we insert more romance into our marriage without trying?

In today’s episode, you’ll discover easy ways to keep your relationship traveling in the direction of comfort and closeness. This episode is short and to the point!

Wipe out neglect by turning towards your partner rather than away from him or her.

This is so simple, yet is one of those things that causes a slow erosion and distance between spouses.

“Turn Towards Your Partner Instead of Away” is the third level of “The Sound Relationship House” Theory as proposed by Dr. John Gottman (www.gottmaninstitute.org).

Be sure to listen to Your Marriage Matters episodes 2 and 3 in order to benefit fully from this process. We will continue with The Sound Relationship House for 6 more episodes. By the time you are finished with this series AND if you practice the suggestions and techniques provided in this series, you will lay a foundation that can eliminate the threat of divorce and discontent in your marriage!

Please don’t think divorce is not a possibility. It’s occurring in 40% of the population. Almost all couples who walk down the aisle of love on their wedding day will proclaim: “It won’t be us!” So who are these 40% of first marriages that end in divorce?

No one knows what the future holds. But we do know there is so much we can do in the present!

I meet men and women almost on a daily basis who are BLINDSIDED. They are SHOCKED that they ended up in a place of separation or divorce. They never thought it would happen to them. And guess what? Do you know what might have saved their marriage?

Are they following this model? Do they know one another’s world (Building Love Maps)? Are they fond and admirable of each other? Are they turning towards each other on a daily basis? Hmm. Something to think about…

Don’t end up going down the path of estrangement and do yourself a favor and take 10 minutes to listen to today’s episode. You won’t be sorry.

 

Fondness and Admiration – YMMP003

Do you want to know how to eliminate the threat of an affair? Want to be in a relationship where the D-word won’t surface? (The D-word = divorce) Give me 12 minutes of your time and you’ll see what I mean.

Do you like your spouse? How do you show it?

Are you fond of your spouse?  Do you admire your spouse?

Today we will talk about why it’s important to honor, respect and be kind to your spouse. Some of us take it for granted, but did you know that if you are fond of your spouse and show admiration, then the likelihood of contempt or an affair is DRASTICALLY reduced?

It takes conscious effort to set aside the flaws, annoyances and teeny, tiny criticisms of our beloved, but it can make or break your marriage over the long haul.

Please, no eye-rolling of public criticisms of your spouse. No one benefits.